Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
He told me he was 'pondering the natural wonder that is my ass'
Like, dude. I'm already fucking you, you don't need to wax poetic.
Isn't he wasted enough that he might actually mean it and not just be trying to get you to fuck him without a condom?
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
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