i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
Call me in 2 minutes and go along with what I say. You're hysterical and I must go comfort you asap. He just asked if I was ready to experience sex with a wizard and he wasnt kidding.
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
Randomize
