PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
Nothing says "Jesus has forgiven your sins" like finding out you're not pregnant on Easter.
I love you.
Bad choice
Randomize
