Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT!
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
They took my balls.
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Randomize
