And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
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