He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
Randomize
