Note to self. Never fart in a tanning bed
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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