I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
mondays should just be called national damage control day
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
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