12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
Randomize
