is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
Randomize
