HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
I was just walking down the hall and passed a very pregnant girl wearing a shirt that said "blame it on the aaaaaa-alcohol." I can't decide if she's brilliantly witty or just pointing fingers.
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
Randomize
