Dating a girl 4 years younger than you is like living in a Taylor Swift song...
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize