I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
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