shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
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