ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Randomize
