O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
Best thing I ever did was get a dog. She's like a living trip alarm to warn me of visitors while I'm masturbating.
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
Randomize