So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Randomize
