She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
Randomize
