Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
Jesus fucking Mary Christ if I have to clean shit out of my fucking bathtub one more fucking time I'm gonna murder a fucking kitten
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