I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
19 Confessions From A Dude With A Micropenis
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
17 Exes Admit Why They Were Crazy In Their Past Relationship
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?