so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
I'm hungover as fuck. My vagina hurts. I locked my keys in my car. It's about 93* outside. We're having sex in the pool when I get home
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
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