Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
I'd love to come and give you a massage, but we already duck taped my keys to the ceiling...
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
I just spontaneously learned how to embroider at three in the morning.
I also almost burned the house down in the process. Don't ask me how. It's a long story.
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize
