I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
Hows this for an invention: a toilet that weighs your poop
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
I asked a lamppost to be my valentine. Also: I'm wearing a sombrero. We need more sombrero in our lives.
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
Randomize
