I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
Randomize
