idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
19 Cringe-worthy Bachelorette Party Texts
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
The 23 Worst Things That Have Happened After a One Night Stand
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car