It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
I have got to stop singing on voicemails. I just left my dad a 6 minute musical message.
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
Randomize
