Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Literally everyone in the bar was absolutely hammered out of their minds. I swear I even saw the bartender swigging jd when he thought no one was looking. And there was me thinking Britain was the booziest nation in the world.
Welcome to America. You're gonna love it.
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
Randomize