It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
Randomize
