so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
