Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
bad sex. bad bad bad. it was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty pringles can. why do these guys always seem to find me?
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
Randomize