Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
I'm so drunk that I ordered a root beer at the bar. Whoops?
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
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