when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
Randomize
