I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
There r osticjed everywhere
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
Next time I think buying tan-thru bikinis is a good idea, remind me of that time I passed out in one and burned the epic shit out of my pussy.
When was that?
Yesterday. Bring aloe. For my pussy.
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
Randomize
