he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
Randomize
