question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
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