drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
Im in a bar and I just invented a scrabble drinking game. People are cheering. It's like the universe has aligned itself.
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
Randomize
