dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
He woke up wondering who broke in and rearranged all the furniture. He reviewed 11 hours of security footage before I told him he did it while whiskey-drunk.
Randomize