Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
Just yelled out loud for someone to buy me a drink, 30 seconds later random guy on grindr asks what I'm drinking.
There's a 98% chance your drink will taste like rohypnol
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
I am mentally ready for anal.
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
Randomize
