okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
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