The only reason I'm still around is so I can grow a huge Gandalf beard when my hair turns gray
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
I don't want my vagina anymore.
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
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