Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
I’m going to bedazzle that dick
What does that even mean
No idea, but I guarantee he’ll get hard every time he remembers it
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