This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
This is the worst date ever. Pls kill me. No, wait, scratch that, stick to the original plan of killing Paris Hilton, I'll live though this
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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