Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
