ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
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