Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
I need a hoe opinion
go on
Couch. On fire.
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