I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
Don't ever give your dog some hamburger at midnight. Its impossible to enjoy a late night burger when your dog just threw it up all over your carpet. Gremlin rules work with dogs.
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
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