I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
Randomize