Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (248): Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes http://tfl.nu/lrst
  Replies (1) Good night (1944) Bad night (559)
• Favorite

  (916): View more from California

  I'm really into asian looking animals

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (916): I'm really into asian looking animals http://tfl.nu/3ena
  Replies (3) Good night (898) Bad night (1025)
• Favorite

  (410): View more from Maryland

  Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (410): Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was http://tfl.nu/b47l
  Replies (14) Good night (670) Bad night (1383)
• Favorite

  (216): View more from Ohio

  let's bang

  (773): View more from Illinois

  You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (216): let's bang (773): You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no. http://tfl.nu/cr4i
  Replies (68) Good night (1427) Bad night (6376)
• Favorite

  (949): View more from California

  I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (949): I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads. http://tfl.nu/gq0b
  Replies (24) Good night (5356) Bad night (687)
• Favorite

  (516): View more from New York

  Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (516): Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects. http://tfl.nu/hkn5
  Replies (48) Good night (742) Bad night (5308)
• Favorite

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (617): he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave http://tfl.nu/ypxh
  Replies (32) Good night (630) Bad night (5012)
• Favorite

  (612): View more from Minnesota

  Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (612): Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong? http://tfl.nu/gz8r
  Replies (44) Good night (1567) Bad night (4792)
• Favorite

  (847): View more from Illinois

  I think as far as last words to bitter ex girlfriends go, "enjoy that staph infection youre about to get in your uterus" is right up there with the best

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (847): I think as far as last words to bitter ex girlfriends go, "enjoy that staph infection youre about to get in your uterus" is right up there with the best http://tfl.nu/7i53
  Replies (7) Good night (2075) Bad night (1289)
• Favorite

  (360): View more from Washington

  Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (360): Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever. http://tfl.nu/hma8
  Replies (23) Good night (2736) Bad night (709)
• Favorite

  (262): View more from Wisconsin

  Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon

  (1-262): View more from Wisconsin

  That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (262): Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon (1-262): That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months http://tfl.nu/99ql
  Replies (1) Good night (1590) Bad night (474)
• Favorite

  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (608): She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour http://tfl.nu/nua1
  Replies (1) Good night (736) Bad night (412)
• Favorite

  (509): View more from Washington

  This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (509): This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it. http://tfl.nu/jpqq
  Replies (4) Good night (779) Bad night (417)
• Favorite

  (937): View more from Ohio

  Right now, millions of people are waking up to get ready for work, start their day, and be productive members of society. I just found a 40 stashed in my fridge. I'm getting daybreak drunk. Zero fucks are given.

  (415): View more from California

  Isn't being unemployed beautiful sometimes?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (937): Right now, millions of people are waking up to get ready for work, start their day, and be productive members of society. I just found a 40 stashed in my fridge. I'm getting daybreak drunk. Zero fucks are given. (415): Isn't being unemployed beautiful sometimes? http://tfl.nu/8d8c
  Replies (4) Good night (966) Bad night (475)
• Favorite

  (720): View more from Colorado

  Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (720): Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital? http://tfl.nu/6lgx
  Replies (9) Good night (525) Bad night (422)

Randomize