Texts From Last Night

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  (434): View more from Virginia

  There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.

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  (434): There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically. http://tfl.nu/76cj
  Replies (25) Good night (14267) Bad night (1060)
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  (626): View more from California

  What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?

  (1-626): View more from California

  You have mice?

  (626): View more from California

  no why?

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  (626): What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans? (1-626): You have mice? (626): no why? http://tfl.nu/7zgo
  Replies (15) Good night (3852) Bad night (993)
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  (409): View more from Texas

  It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.

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  (409): It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself. http://tfl.nu/yf3o
  Replies (34) Good night (4285) Bad night (918)
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  (571): View more from Virginia

  i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame

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  (571): i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame http://tfl.nu/i2ht
  Replies (48) Good night (9131) Bad night (831)
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  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.

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  (717): I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into. http://tfl.nu/2oug
  Replies (13) Good night (927) Bad night (3246)
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  (305): View more from Florida

  It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children

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  (305): It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children http://tfl.nu/y5x1
  Replies (9) Good night (3009) Bad night (1078)
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  (307): View more from Wyoming

  I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.

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  (307): I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome. http://tfl.nu/fygk
  Replies (4) Good night (661) Bad night (1994)
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  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball

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  (724): Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball http://tfl.nu/n4gl
  Replies (5) Good night (999) Bad night (725)
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  (808): View more from Hawaii

  Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?

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  (808): Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space? http://tfl.nu/h1sf
  Replies (12) Good night (1501) Bad night (900)
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  (214): View more from Texas

  If I come in tomorrow with a cane and a seeing eye dog it's because I just mixed up my salicylic acid acne stuff with my eye makeup remover

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  (214): If I come in tomorrow with a cane and a seeing eye dog it's because I just mixed up my salicylic acid acne stuff with my eye makeup remover http://tfl.nu/4860
  Replies (6) Good night (369) Bad night (854)
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  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED

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  (570): WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED http://tfl.nu/najp
  Replies (3) Good night (594) Bad night (347)
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  (312): View more from Illinois

  At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.

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  (312): At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific. http://tfl.nu/evej
  Replies (1) Good night (605) Bad night (373)
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  (361): View more from Texas

  I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.

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  (361): I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08. http://tfl.nu/948b
  Replies (3) Good night (765) Bad night (418)
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  (917): View more from New York City

  Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.

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  (917): Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air. http://tfl.nu/q0rt
  Replies (3) Good night (663) Bad night (323)
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  (520): View more from Arizona

  I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.

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  (520): I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me. http://tfl.nu/9wk5
  Replies (2) Good night (439) Bad night (194)

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