The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
Randomize
