i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Randomize
